Farce. Translated and adapted by Greg Leaming. From the play by Maurice Hennequin and Pierre Veber.
Cast: 8m., 6w. The Dupont family is thrilled that their naïve young daughter has married Count Robert de Trivelin. However, upon returning from their honeymoon, it is made clear that the young bridegroom has yet to consummate the marriage, and indeed seems to be suffering from a psychological block brought on by a border crossing guard yelling out "Have you anything to declare?" at a particularly inopportune moment. With only three days left to meet his mother-in-law's demands for a grandson, or at least the promise of one, the count seeks the assistance of Zeze, a courtesan who is passing herself off to her clientele as a prominent artist. The entire Dupont family manages to parade through Zeze's salon and back to the Dupont home, along with a sobbing ex-suitor of the bride, a camel dealer of unknown origin, and a maid desperate to break ties with Zeze and start a career of her own. As the clock continues to tick away, a chaotic race to consummate the marriage results in everyone learning just a little bit more than they might have wanted to. Two int. sets. Approximate running time: 2 hours, 15 minutes.